Dark Matter

“I understand now why victims don’t fight back. I cannot imagine trying to overcome this man. Trying to run.”

When Jason2 abducts Jason, Jason experiences violence for the first time: He is an ordinary person and has never been involved in a physical confrontation. By the end of the novel, Jason has learned how to defend himself and those he loves. He succeeds in overpowering and killing Jason2, moving from a character who is a passive victim to a survivor who can kill in self-defense.

“…worst thing you can do is try to manage this on your own. Let’s be honest. You’re the kind of guy who thinks he’s strong enough to push through anything.”

When Jason arrives in Jason2’s world, he is disoriented and terrified of being in an unfamiliar reality. Leighton knows Jason2’s personality as someone who refuses help, even when he needs it. Jason is the same way, but over the course of the novel, he learns to accept help—particularly from Amanda—to survive. Jason2’s downfall is that he is a loner who does not know how to trust others. He would rather usurp someone else’s family than establish meaningful relationships within his own life.

“In this sliver of quiet and calm, the principle of Occam’s razor whispers to me—all things being equal, the simplest solution tends to be the right one. Does the idea that I was drugged and kidnapped by a secret, experimental group for the purposes of mind control or God-knows-what fit that bill? Hardly. They would’ve needed to either brainwash me to convince me that my house was not my house, or in the space of several hours, get rid of my family and gut the interior so I didn’t recognize anything. Or—is it more plausible that a tumor in my brain has turned my world upside down?”

From a realistic standpoint, Jason’s reality is impossible for him to comprehend. Before he understands the box and how it works, he looks for logical answers to explain his situation. His struggle to ascertain his situation keeps the reader in suspense; because the story is told in the first-person present tense, the reader only knows as much as Jason knows. Unlike in Chapter 1, where Jason hints that he knows what will happen, in this chapter, he remains in the present moment, allowing multiple possibilities to exist for how the story will unfold.

“What will happen when this last physical trace of my marriage is gone? When there’s no anchor?”

Jason’s family is his identity. When he loses that, he no longer knows who he is. The novel’s events test Jason’s resolve to return to his home world, especially when he and Amanda become close. As time goes on, Jason’s goal of returning to Daniela seems increasingly futile, and he loses his sense of self. At the same time, the trials he faces strengthen his resolve—and his desperation—to figure out how to reenter his world, and then, how to overcome Jason2.

“How did forty-five minutes turn into almost three hours?”

Chapter 4 is the first chapter that switches to Daniela’s perspective. At this point, the reader is not aware that the man who comes home from the Village Tap is Jason2, not Jason. Staying out late is unlike Jason, and this is the first indication to Daniela that something is wrong. Jason2 explains it with his anecdote about almost getting hit by the taxi, which makes his absence and apparent change in mood probable. These changes become more concerning to Daniela, until she realizes that the incident with the taxi cannot be the cause of Jason2’s behavior.

“Experimental physics—hell, all of science—is about solving problems. However, you can’t solve them all at once. There’s always a larger, overarching question—the big target. But if you obsess on the sheer enormity of it, you lose focus.”

After he escapes from Mercy Hospital, Jason finally has a moment to try and figure out how to cope with his situation. As a scientist, he utilizes rational thinking; he knows he cannot answer the bigger question of what happened to him yet, but he can try to find Daniela. His focus on finding her is the thread that unifies the novel’s action because whatever detours Jason’s journey takes, he always returns to this goal.

“Nothing exists save empty space—and you…. And you are not you—you have no body, no blood, no bones, you are but a thought.”

Daniela2 uses this quotation from Mark Twain at the end of her labyrinth. It echoes the theme of Jason breaking down his identity to the quantum level, beyond time and space, when he enters the box: It is his thoughts, not his physical self, that dictate what world he ends up in. Likewise, it is the power of his thoughts that helps him return to his own world.

“I wonder if Daniela wants me to leave. If I’m that oblivious, last-remaining guest who doesn’t realize when he’s outstayed his welcome.”

Daniela2’s relationship with Ryan2 shocks Jason. For the first time, he is in the uncomfortable position of being a third wheel with them, just as Ryan is with Jason and Daniela in Jason’s world. Crouch uses the narrative technique of a plot twist to add a complication into what seems like a moment of resolution: Jason has finally found Daniela, but she is dating his rival. It soon becomes clear that Daniela and Jason are drawn together despite Ryan; until then, Jason is in an emotionally taxing, hitherto unknown position, which jeopardizes his larger goal of getting Daniela’s help.

“I had told you the day before that I was pregnant. You needed time to think about it. You came to my loft and said it was the hardest decision you’d ever made, but you were busy with your research, the research that would ultimately win that big award. You said the next year of your life would be in a cleanroom and that I deserved better. That our child deserved better.”

Daniela2 cries when she hears Jason’s story about their family life together. In this moment, Jason learns what happened when Jason2 made the choice that Jason had been pondering all these years: what would have happened if he and Daniela never started a family? Daniela got the art career she wanted, but the emotional cost was high. This is Jason’s first indication that Jason2 is callous. The more Jason learns about Jason2’s life, the less he envies his scientific success and the more confident he becomes in his choice to give up his career to have a family.

“It’s terrifying when you consider that every thought we have, every choice we could possibly make, branches into a new world. […] In a different reality, instead of the pier, we went to the symphony. In one, we stayed home. In another still, we got into a fatal wreck on Lakeshore Drive and never made it anywhere.”

Daniela thinks Jason2 is speaking hypothetically when they are having dinner together in downtown Chicago. But after traveling to many different realities, Jason2 has seen firsthand how small decisions lead to different outcomes, or how even the same decisions can lead to different outcomes. This section introduces the concept of dark matter, which gives the novel its title.

“The Many-Worlds interpretation of quantum mechanics posits that all possible realities exist. That everything which has a probability of happening is happening. Everything that might have occurred in our past did occur, only in another universe.”

This statement explicitly states what is happening to Jason: Thanks to Jason2’s discovery, Jason is experiencing something that is supposed to exist only in theory. Crouch uses Jason2’s notes to incorporate exposition on the science underlying the novel. At this point, Jason still does not know that another version of him exists, but he is beginning to understand the forces at work.

“Stepping into the box and taking the drug is like walking through a one-way door.”

Amanda explains to Jason that Matthew Snell, the first scientist who piloted the box, disappeared. Jason’s return astounded the Velocity Laboratories scientists because no one had ever reappeared. Of course, Jason2 did not really return, and this confusion is the cause for the events in the novel’s first half. Until Amanda and Jason figure out how to control the box, they have no way of knowing that it’s possible to go back through the same door.

“He tells himself he’s giving you the chance of a lifetime. He wants a shot at the path not taken. Why wouldn’t you? I’m not saying it’s right. I’m saying that’s how a good man works himself up to do a terrible thing. It’s Human Behavior 101.”

Amanda explains how Jason2 rationalized stealing Jason’s life. Jason2 correctly assumed that another version of himself would have obsessed about what his life might have been like if he’d made different choices. But rather than consider any kind of ethical interaction, Jason2 abducted Jason with no explanation. Additionally, Leighton’s ruthless actions imply that almost everyone at Velocity is ethically compromised.

“It’s a troubling paradox—I have total control, but only to the extent I have control over myself. My emotions. My inner storm. The secret engines that drive me. If there are infinite worlds, how do I find the one that is uniquely, specifically mine?”

Jason learns that his emotions, desires, and memories determine the world that lies beyond the box’s door. This raises the question: Who is Jason? In a novel that is, on one level, about the mysteries of the universe, Crouch reveals that the greatest mystery is the self. This adds a layer of urgency to the plot because Jason’s circumstances constantly conspire to unravel his sense of identity.

“If you strip away all the trappings of personality and lifestyle, what are the core components that make me me?”

This question encapsulates the theme of identity. Jason has met dozens of versions of himself, all of whom are equally “Jason.” Therefore, what makes him unique cannot be himself. Eventually, Jason realizes that the specific, unrepeatable bonds and experiences he has created with his loved ones define who he is.

“I realize I’ve always looked at Charlie’s birth and my choice to make a life with Daniela as the threshold event that caused the trajectory of our lives to swing away from success in our careers. But that’s an oversimplification. Yes, Jason2 walked away from Daniela and Charlie and subsequently had the breakthrough. But there are a million Jasons who walked away and didn’t invent the box.”

Before Jason entered the box, he thought there was only one alternative version of his life, one way that things would have been different. After his experiences, he realizes that the life he envisioned as his alternative—Jason2’s life—was only one of the many possibilities that could have resulted from his leaving Daniela. This realization helps him let go of his regret because he knows that the reality is much more complex than envisioned; envy, rather than scientific logic, was driving his assumptions.

“Until everything topples, we have no idea what we actually have, how precariously and perfectly it all hangs together.”

This line echoes Jason’s observations about the nature of tragedy in Chapter 1. A life that seems ordinary is actually the result of innumerable factors, and any positive aspects could have just as easily been catastrophic, life-altering disasters. Jason’s life is not perfect, but when Daniela and Charlie are taken away, he realizes that their love, health, and safety mean more to him than anything else in the universe.

“I’ve never hit a man. Never even tried to. But if I want my family back, there’s simply no way around it. I have to do a terrible thing.”

These lines echo Jason’s sentiments about victimization in the first chapter. While Jason is still an ordinary man thrust into an extraordinary situation, he has reached an understanding: He can no longer act as he normally would. He must step out of his comfort zone yet again—this time, with fatal consequences.

“Jason8: Why’d you call it off, jason6?

Jason6: What’s the point of going forward with it? If I got rid of him, one of you would just show up and do the same thing to me.

Jason3: Did everyone run through the game-theory scenarios?

Jason4: Yes.

Jason6: Yes.

Jason8: Yes.

JasonADMIN: Yes.

Jason3: So we all know there’s no way this ends well.”

This chat, which solves the mystery of Jason’s multiple appearances in the sporting goods store, adds levity to an otherwise grim scenario. Now that Jason knows he and Jason2 are not the only versions of him in this world and that the other Jasons have considered killing Jason2, he must rethink his strategy. This pushes him to once again question what makes him different from his doppelgangers.

“There can be no sharing. It’s strictly competitive, a zero-sum game, where only one of us can win.”

The word “game” leads Jason to game theory as the solution to his problem. Because all the Jasons want the same thing, it is impossible for them to cooperate. Therefore, they can only compete for the “prize,” which is a life with Daniela and Charlie. The gun-buying incident shows that multiple Jasons can have the same idea, so it is difficult, if not impossible, for Jason to proceed; his fear that Daniela and Charlie could be harmed pushes him to find a solution to a seemingly unwinnable scenario.

“Makes me wonder, who is the ideal Jason? Does he even exist?”

Jason learns that he must let go of all his preconceptions about his identity—his arrogance, biases, the feeling that he is special—to arrive at the truth of his existence. Once, a life like Jason2’s was Jason’s ideal. Since that image has crumbled, he is left to question if there is one best, truest version of the self.

“If I hadn’t seen that belligerent drunk at the bar last night, obnoxiously hitting on those women and getting thrown out by the bouncer, it would never have occurred to me to get myself arrested as a ploy to make Daniela and Charlie come to me in a safe environment.”

Jason makes his defining choice by identifying with someone whom he would normally shun. The situation shows him the importance of luck, not just choices, as a determining factor in how situations unfold. That realization erodes the fallacy of control even further.

“All your life you’re told you’re unique. An individual. That no one on the planet is just like you. It’s humanity’s anthem.”

Dark Matter is a thought exercise that challenges the notion of selfhood. Especially in the United States, which promotes individualism and competitive self-interest, the belief in one’s individuality and the right to protect everything associated with it is the underlying principle of society. Jason’s experiences ultimately uphold the concept, with the caveat that one’s uniqueness includes their loved ones.