From the Ashes: My Story of Being Métis, Homeless, and Finding My Way

Jesse is arrested one last time for breaking and entering and smoking crack. He calls Harvest House and begs them to bail him out. Eleven days later, he is released into rehab.

Gary Wand, the director of Harvest House, is a recovering addict. He began running to get sober 15 years ago and now runs a running program at the center. Jesse wants to be like Gary but is worried about running on his injured foot; however, Gary encourages him to run slowly. Jesse hears Grandpa in his head telling him to get going and stop feeling sorry for himself. The process feels like “running on broken glass” (324), but the pain is bearable, and Jesse is surprised to find that he is able to do it.

Nicole, the CEO of Harvest House, receives an email from Jesse’s mother, Blanche, who has been trying to find him for years. Jesse calls Blanche, and they sob together on the phone. Jesse feels he has rediscovered a lost part of himself.

A professor from the University of Ottawa oversees her graduate students conducting classes on communication skills and basic etiquette at Harvest House. Jesse takes these classes seriously and works on his reading again. He passes his GED (General Educational Development tests) and eventually graduates from etiquette classes as well.

Jesse gets a call from Grandma, who is seriously ill with leukemia. He uses a day pass to visit her in the hospital and is dismayed to see how sick she is. He promises Grandma that he will go back to school. They hug, and Grandma eventually pushes Jesse away, the same way she did on his first day of kindergarten; it is her way of saying, “Go on, make your way in the world. Make me proud” (332). She passes away two weeks later.

Harvest House graduates Jesse on the day Grandma dies. He is upgraded to a room in integration housing, and the first thing he does is start a Facebook account. He gets messages from old friends who have been looking for him and are glad he is alive. Leeroy cleaned up and joined the army 5 years ago; Stan got a good job and is doing well; Lucie, too, messages Jesse, offering consolation for Grandma’s passing.

Jesse and Lucie begin talking more often. Lucie is a mature student in university, completely sober and living an independent life. Jesse writes her poetry, and she sends him books to read. They Skype every day, and before every call, Jesse showers and dresses his best; he wants to impress Lucie with how clean he is.

Jesse’s probation officer arrives for a last weekly visit. Jesse has finished serving time and has done so without a single violation. The officer points out that along with Jesse’s desire to live, the entire team at Harvest House who helped him deserves credit, too. Jesse plans to meet Lucie in Toronto after leaving Harvest House. The officer hopes Jesse will continue to make good choices.

Within two days of spending time together, Jesse knows Lucie is the one for him. They discuss Grandpa and how he and Jesse have been too stubborn to let their fight go, despite the love between them. The last time Jesse saw Grandpa was at Grandma’s funeral; he visits Grandpa in the hospital, where he, too, is sick with cancer. Jesse apologizes to Grandpa; the latter has heard about everything Jesse has done to better himself and tells Jesse that he is proud of him. Grandpa passes away a month and a half later, six months after Grandma.

Jesse begins installing countertops again, but a year in, Lucie reminds him of his dream to attend university. She pushes him to pursue education and supports him throughout the process. In recent months, she has taught Jesse how to drive, fill out forms, use a computer, open a bank account, and make a debt repayment plan, among other things. Once Jesse completes his application, he feels a sense of accomplishment, which Lucie explains she didn’t want to take away from him.

Jesse saves up enough money to pay $3,000 in fines that he collected during his time on the streets. He pays his fines all at once, and it feels like “a break with the past” (348).

Jesse attends his first class at university and initially feels out of place among the much younger students, with their gadgets and clean histories. He then remembers how hard he worked to learn in jail and rehab. He realizes he has the right to chase his dreams too and deserves to be educated like everyone else.

Jesse takes Indigenous history classes to make sense of why so many from his community turn to a life of crime or live on the streets; he wants to understand his own choices. Jesse asks his mother, Blanche, and Aunt Yvonne about his family’s history for an assignment and learns they were Michif rebel fighters. Aunt Yvonne shows him the Morrissette family tree and reveals they are Cree and road-allowance Michif, also called Métis. Jesse comes from a long line of leaders and resistance fighters. When he sees pictures of the Battle of Batoche, he remembers the dream he once had and is amazed that it was real.

Jesse’s professor considers his paper the best one she has read all year and introduces him to Dr. Carolyn Podruchny, a professor at New York University and expert in Métis history. Carolyn takes Jesse on as a student and research assistant, and they spend weeks visiting important historical sites and interviewing Cree and Métis leaders. Jesse’s maternal grandparents’ road-allowance house is the last stop on this trip. His childhood memories wash over him, and he remembers his family, people, and identity.

Jesse and Lucie get married in a small ceremony at City Hall. They go camping for their honeymoon, and early in the morning, they clasp hands at the lakeside, promise each other their love and support, and submerge their hands in the water. Jesse imagines his ancestors to have wed this way and thinks it is the best wedding he could have had.

Part 4, Chapter 88 is a verse chapter in which the speaker walks back to an old home. The people living there have passed away, but he offers an apology for breaking their hearts nevertheless, a “silent amends” they will never hear.

Aunt Sherry, Sonny’s sister, gives Jesse a box of letters that Sonny wrote the last time he was in prison, before his release and disappearance in 1982. Sonny affirms his love for and pride in Jesse in these letters. Jesse is grateful to have found a way back to Sonny after almost four decades.

Jesse graduates in October 2015 and carries a picture of Grandma in his pocket during convocation. Although she never saw Jesse graduate or met Lucie, Jesse is certain of her blessing. While planning his proposal to Lucie, he confided in Aunt Sherry that he didn’t have money to buy a ring; she gave him Grandma’s engagement ring, with “fifty-seven years of love on there” (366).

Even a decade after the accident, Jesse’s foot still hurts. He also experiences psychological pain, nightmares of his old life that are sometimes too much to bear. Lucie comforts him through both of these pains. However, Jesse knows his injured foot changed everything for him; the pain is a blessing, reminding him of how lucky he is to be alive, and makes him value every step he takes.

Jesse arrives in Ottawa, where he is presenting his work on the definition of Indigenous homelessness in Canada at a conference, as a Resident Scholar at the Canadian Observatory on Homelessness. He has become an expert on Métis history, having won awards and scholarships for his work. After the conference, he goes for a walk along the streets he used to frequent in the past and sees the Centennial Flame fountain. He meets a former friend from a shelter, but the man doesn’t recognize him; Jesse gives the man some money and returns home, as the streets don’t feel like his home anymore. However, he doesn’t regret missing dinner with his colleagues; Jesse has “explored homelessness” in a way they never have and never will and has finally said goodbye to it.

Epilogue 2 is a verse chapter in which the speaker sometimes sleepwalks, his soul still unaware that his wanderings are over; he has a home now.