Genesis Begins Again

When Genesis gets home, she finds a note on the front door addressed to her father that says they have yet to receive his payment for the first month’s rent. Genesis is panicked that they are going to lose everything again, so she quickly folds the note up and stuffs it in the back of her sock drawer. Unable to relax, she wanders down to the kitchen, where she opens up one of the cabinets to find three bottles of vodka and whiskey. Her anger at her father bubbles over into rage, and in an almost out-of-body experience, she opens each bottle and pours the alcohol into the sink. As Genesis starts to come back to reality, she cries, realizing what she has done and terrified of what her dad will do when he finds out.

Mama comes home, and Genesis panics when she realizes the kitchen smells like alcohol. She hurries to help Mama with the groceries and with dinner so that she won’t spend longer than necessary in the kitchen. As they eat dinner, Genesis thinks about how she can’t tell Mama about the note or else Mama will make them move back in with Grandma. She tries to distract her instead and tells Mama about school. She tells her that Sophia invited her over for dinner because she knows it will make Mama happy.

The next morning, Emory still hasn’t come home. Mama is furious.

The next day, Genesis asks Troy and Sophia what the big deal is with the talent show. They tell her the PTA rolls out a red carpet, and the winners are treated like celebrities. Troy says that he plays the violin every year, which Genesis thinks of as a “white people’s instrument.” She wishes Grandma could meet Troy so she can blow a hole in her family’s tradition theory.

When Genesis gets home, her dad still isn’t there. She goes up to her room to practice because she is thinking of auditioning for the talent show. She ties her favorite black button-down shirt over her head and puts on Mama’s light foundation, then begins to sing and dance along to an Ella Fitzgerald CD she borrowed from Mrs. Hill. She loses herself in the music and forgets about everything else until she opens her eyes and notices her dad standing in the doorway. He is clearly drunk. He calls down to Mama, mockingly, because “look, your daughter’s been performing in whiteface” (194). Genesis is humiliated as he tells her with “ugly eagerness” to keep on with the show.

Mama is furious at him for being drunk and for not calling for days. He pleads with her and tells her that he paid the rent. Mama tells Genesis to pack a bag as her dad swears to Mama that this is the last time he will drink; he just was having one last big celebration before he commits. Mama ignores him, and Genesis thinks about all the moments she and her dad sang together, and how, even when she was little, she felt like they were sharing a moment of realness.

Genesis scrubs Mama’s makeup off so hard that her skin feels raw, but she can still hear her dad laughing at her inside her head. She turns off the water and looks at her feet, “black and dirty,” “filthy” (197). She hates it.

As they park in front of Grandma’s house, Mama breaks down and starts sobbing. Grandma gives Mama a hard time when they get inside the house, badgering her for, as she assumes, getting evicted again. She continues to pester Mama for details over the next few days, so Mama keeps leaving the house to get some space from her. On Friday, Genesis is surprised when she overhears Grandma apologizing to Mama. She admits that she has made some mistakes and that she just doesn’t like to see Mama hurt.

Mama and Genesis go back home on Sunday night. Her dad is not apologetic for his behavior. Genesis cuts apart her black shirt and decides that she won’t pretend she is performing anymore, especially not with her dad. Angry that he is right, that she looks nothing like Mama, and angry that nothing she has tried has even worked, she takes a bath with bleach in hopes it will lighten her skin.

Mama comes to her bedroom to talk after she is done with her bath. She tells Genesis that she isn’t ready to leave her dad yet. Genesis hates to admit it, but she isn’t ready to leave her dad yet either because if she does, then she’ll “never truly be his baby girl […] but Chubby Cheeks from the basement” (209).

Mama says she was so proud that Genesis was “a chocolate baby” because when she was a young girl, everyone made fun of her for being light-skinned. Genesis is shocked by this, but Mama explains that everyone thought she was stuck-up and that she thought she was better than everyone. Grandma, on the other hand, loved when people said Mama looked white. She loved Mama’s long hair, but girls bullied her and yanked on her hair. Grandma made sure to always tell Mama she was “better than most Blacks” (211).

Mama tells Genesis that her dad does love her, but he just had a bad childhood, and it brings out the anger in him. His mother used to call him names and make him feel terrible for being dark-skinned. She tells Genesis that she doesn’t believe in the old family tradition of marrying only light-skinned, but Genesis knows that deep down, Mama does believe it a little bit because of things she occasionally says, like the comments she makes about Genesis’s hair.

In chorus class the next day, Genesis is surprised that Nia asks her for her opinion on performing an original piece at the talent show auditions. Genesis encourages her and says if her music is anything like the amazing essay she wrote, then she will win. Afterward, Mrs. Hill teaches Genesis to scat like Ella Fitzgerald. She encourages Genesis again to audition for the talent show.

On her way to tutoring later, she sees Troy in the hallway with two other boys who seem to be bothering him, but Troy just tells her they wanted notes. Genesis drops the subject.

After school, Genesis and Sophia watch softball practice. Sophia tells her that she used to play, but when things got too hectic, her mother made her stop. Genesis tells her she might audition for the talent show, but she is afraid to put herself out there in case people make fun of her. Sophia is genuinely happy for her. She tells her she understands because she used to feel the same way in softball.

For the rest of the week, Genesis worries about an upcoming math test on Friday. She is ecstatic when she passes with a 76 percent. Troy hugs her when she tells him.