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Ada LimónA modern alternative to SparkNotes and CliffsNotes, SuperSummary offers high-quality Study Guides with detailed chapter summaries and analysis of major themes, characters, and more.
The “us” in “Instructions on Not Giving Up” has gone through a difficult time. The poet alludes to both “what winter did to us” (Line 10) as well as “the mess of us, the hurt, the empty” (Line 12). Even the bold “Spring” (Line 5) day has a “slate / sky” (Lines 4-5) tinged with “rains” (Line 5). The poet has struggled, and while this strife has technically passed, the emotional gloom lingers.
The blossoms on the trees in the landscape around the poet seem like “trinkets” (Line 7), cheap and insubstantial. Their petals have fallen like “the confetti of aftermath” (Line 8). It is only the “greening of the trees” (Line 5) that allows her to see that there is rebirth, a “continuous living” (Line 11). The “patient, plodding” (9) of the tree’s “green skin / growing” (Lines 9-10) gives the poet hope that she, too, can be resilient. Like the “tree seems to say” (Line 13), she can “take it all” (Line 14). The cycle of life—death and rebirth—is ceaseless. It is important to move on from hardship, to go beyond the superficial, and understand that the “slick new leaf / unfurling” (Lines 13-14) must occur. In her essay for Oprah Daily about the poem, Limón noted the tree symbolizes a need to “surrender to ongoingness” (See: Further Reading & Resources) despite despair.
Toxic positivity is the attitude that people should be indiscriminately positive, even when faced with difficulty or tragedy; this mindset is called “toxic” because it does not allow for healthy psychological processes and, by masking over genuine problems, prevents those problems from ever being addressed. Showing an awareness of this toxicity, Limón’s poem suggests that looking at the bright side isn’t always the best method for dealing with life’s turmoil. The poet suggests that “not giving up” is not about creating a show of happiness—as symbolized by the flowering “crabapple” (Line 2). This is just a “display” (Line 3), an ephemeral response. This “confetti of aftermath” (Line 8) may fool everyone into thinking everything is fine, but the hard work of healing from “winter” (Line 10) is a slower process, one that is “patient, plodding” (Line 9). Healing does not happen overnight but instead in “continuous living despite” (Line 12) pain. Rough attributes—“the mess […] hurt […] empty” (Line 12)—are part of the experience of life and cannot be hidden away in a bouquet of “fuchsia funnels” (Line 1) or false platitudes. We can’t only pick the pretty “candy-colored blossoms” (Line 4) and call it a day. The poet insists that we must learn to “take it all” (Line 14), to grow a new “green skin” (Line 8) that will enable us to survive.
Limón has admitted that her work is highly autobiographical and that the scenario in “Instructions on Not Giving Up” was an actual personal experience of hers (See: Further Reading & Resources). Several of the poems in The Carrying, the collection including “Instructions on Not Giving Up,” center on Limón’s personal experience with infertility. This poem can also be read through that lens. The initial descriptions of the flowering “crabapple” (Line 2) with its overabundance of blooms indicate a thriving, prolific environment for growth. A botanist approach to flowers sees their purpose as reproductive, yet the poet turns from the “obscene display” (Line 3). She confides that the “winter” (Line 10) has done something to “us” (Line 10), which suggests someone close to the poet has been affected negatively, too. She goes on to discuss the “mess of us, the hurt, the empty” (Line 12), the latter of which—the adjective “empty” (Line 12) functioning as a noun—indicates a sense of lack that has brought sadness and caused stress. Searching for an alternative to the fecundity around her, she sees the “greening of the trees” (Line 5), which offers a different way to hold on. A “patient, plodding” (Line 9) toward “continuous living” (Line 11) is possible “despite” (Line 11) bad things. There is a recovery—imperfect, but possible if one studies the alternatives.
By Ada Limón