Sandwich

The small, cape-side home where Rocky, Nick, Willa, and Jamie have vacationed each summer since the children were small is quaint but rustic. The plumbing is old, and although the family knows not to “overwhelm the ancient septic system” (a small sign in the bathroom says as much), they immediately clog the toilet (8). Rocky and Nick try to unclog it with a plunger while Willa and Jamie inquire from the hallway about the severity of the issue. Willa asks where the bag of swimsuits is, and Nick tells Rocky he might have accidentally left it at home. Rocky, who is going through perimenopause, is instantly irritated with him, and the two begin to bicker but quickly resolve the disagreement and unclog the toilet.

Rocky, Nick, Willa, Jamie, and Jamie’s girlfriend, Maya, who came along for the trip, head to a local store to buy swimsuits (after confirming their bag of swim stuff got left at home). Rocky reflects on how much time the family has spent in these small Cape Cod businesses over the years. Family vacations aren’t just sun, sand, and surf. They’re trips to the pharmacy and the grocery store. They’re emergency doctor visits and supply runs. They are, Rocky thinks, a reflection of life itself. As the family picks out swimsuits, Rocky marvels at how beautiful the younger generation is. Willa casually hits on the salesgirl, and Maya wears her bralette as a top. Rocky is “here for” the younger generation’s revealing clothing and wishes that she had been able to dress that way when she was young. Rocky no longer feels comfortable in her own body and struggles to find a suit that is both flattering and comfortable. In the dressing room, she’s overcome by nostalgia. It seems only yesterday that her grown children were toddlers, and she wonders how so much time passed in what feels like the blink of an eye.

The family stops by the candy store, another yearly ritual. Maya asks Rocky if parenting Willa and Jamie was always as easy as it looks, and Rocky carefully considers her answer. She responds that for Nick it was probably easier, that during the busy years of Willa and Jamie’s childhood, she often felt overwhelmed, but that in general they were a happy family. Maya asks if Rocky ever considered having more than two children. Rocky answers untruthfully that she didn’t. She knows that Maya has four siblings and is the middle child and that she thinks that her childhood was less idyllic than Jamie’s. Rocky asks if Maya wants to have children, and although Jamie overhears and is exasperated with his mother’s lack of boundaries, Maya happily answers that she does.

In line at the bakery, Rocky and Nick have a disagreement. Rocky is upset that Nick, after so many years of marriage, failed to remember that she doesn’t enjoy sweets first thing in the morning. She tells him that she feels “unseen.” He doesn’t seem to grasp why she’s upset, but she reflects that perhaps this is a blessing: She attempts to explain away her behavior, (she’s tired, having a hot flash, and is perhaps also a tad hungover) and is grateful that Nick forgets (and forgives) the spat quickly. They move on to reminiscing about vacations in years past: There was a time when the children were the first to rise, and Nick and Rocky would wake to find them dressed and ready to head to the bakery even before it opened. These days, Nick and Rocky are the first to wake, and their children often sleep long past noon. Back at the house, they distribute pastries to everyone and then prepare for their day at the beach. After Rocky makes elaborate sandwiches (each person prefers different ingredients), they all head to the beach.

Rocky sits on the beach while the others swim. She relishes her potato chip-stuffed sandwich and a can of ice-cold beer but recalls how stressful lunch at the beach was when the children were young. They always got sand in the food, and managing them was draining. Willa comes in from her dip in the ocean, and the two begin to engage in witty banter. Willa and her mother throw contemporary slang around, and Rocky is amused by “it slaps” as a way to express admiration. She recalls how conscious she was of her body when the children were young. She wore coverups and tried to hide her hips and thighs. Now, as middle age and perimenopause further alter her body, she has finally come to accept it. She no longer cares what people think of her and values comfort more than style or modesty.

Willa notices more algae this year than in years past, and Rocky recalls how much her young children enjoyed exploring the flora and fauna in and around the beach’s tide pools. Willa even wrote her college admissions essay about the tide pools. Rocky and Willa reminisce, and Willa admits to Rocky that as a young girl, she always wanted more siblings. Wistfully, Rocky tells her daughter that she knew that Willa wanted additional sisters and brothers.

Rocky searches through the medicine cabinet for a tube of poison ivy cream and notices how many toiletries are relics from summers past. The sunscreen, cough medicine, soaps, and various other items have been in the medicine cabinet for decades. She can’t find the cream and once again thinks back to summers past. She recalls how draining it was to parent young children but also how each new stage of Willa and Jamie’s childhood brought more time, freedom, and opportunity. Now that Willa and Jamie are grown, Rocky relishes each moment she gets to spend with them. She realizes that if someone had told her long ago how good life would be with adult children, she might not have believed them. They all make dinner together, commenting on various changes in the cottage. They all feel a sense of quasi-betrayal when new pieces of furniture appear. Rocky realizes that they’re united in their desire to keep the cottage the same as it always was. Maya seems to be under the weather, and Rocky observes her carefully to see if she’s drinking alcohol. She idly wonders if Maya is pregnant.