The Most Fun We Ever Had

Fiction | Novel | Adult | Published in 2019

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Summary

Background

Chapter Summaries & Analyses

Prologue-Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4, Chapter 21-Interlude 20

Part 4, Chapter 27-Epilogue

Character Analysis

Themes

Symbols & Motifs

Important Quotes

Essay Topics

Book Club Questions

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Discussion Questions

Themes

The Irrevocable Bonds of Family

Throughout the novel, the Sorensons demonstrate that family bonds are unbreakable. The strength of family bonds is exemplified in the relationship between Wendy and Violet. The two are “Irish twins,” having been born within a year of each other, and being so close in age has bound them together for life. Wendy feels that she will never be closer to anyone because no one else has witnessed life from her perspective. In addition to being sisters, they are best friends.

However, they betray and hurt each other repeatedly throughout the novel. Violet sleeps with Wendy’s ex-boyfriend, fathers a child with him, and never tells her about it. Wendy hires somebody to find Jonah without telling Violet, bringing Violet’s son back into their lives against Violet’s express wishes. Violet, for her part, proves unwilling to be with Wendy when Wendy needs her most—during her stillbirth and the death of her husband. At one point, Violet tells Wendy that she does not want to be a part of her life anymore. Still, the two never stay apart for long, and they reconcile as the novel ends. The durability of their relationship demonstrates that Wendy and Violet are always connected, even when they do not wish to be.

Likewise, Violet is connected to Jonah no matter how much she tries to resist it. She refuses to see her baby when he is born, yet she recognizes him immediately when she sees him for the first time 15 years later. She compares her physical reaction to seeing him to the reaction she had when she first saw her younger two sons: Seeing Jonah is “not like the biological recognition she felt when Wyatt and Eli were born but significant in its own right, a sharp uterine tug that almost made her double over. She didn’t recognize the boy so much as absorb him” (11). Violet’s involuntary bodily response to Jonah emphasizes the biological nature of their connection. She can run away from it, but she can’t deny it.

She acknowledges her connection to Jonah when she talks to Hanna about his future: “‘I already love him,’ she snapped. ‘I fucking gave birth to him’” (55). This quote not only reflects her confused feelings about her first-born son but also underscores the value she places on biological ties. Although she is not yet willing to welcome Jonah into her life, she feels connected to him as his mother and resents the implication that she does not.

The Suffering of Not Being Seen

All four of the Sorenson sisters suffer from their family’s judgments. This occurs despite the family’s best intentions. The Sorenson family members are shown to love each other even through intense hurt and betrayal. Still, the family members are largely unable to see each other for who they are. Because of this, all four sisters suffer in different ways.

Wendy suffers because her family sees the difficult parts of her nature but not her more redeeming characteristics. Her family has always seen her as the wild card because she acted the most outrageously as a child and teen. After the death of her husband, she starts drinking regularly to cope. Her family sees this dangerous behavior, but they do not see the sacrifices she makes for her sisters. She cares for Violet during her pregnancy, organizes Jonah’s adoption, flies out to retrieve Jonah after he runs away, and talks to Grace after Grace’s first sexual experience. She is always there for her family, but this escapes her family’s notice.

Violet and Liza both suffer because their siblings and parents see them as being capable and self-sufficient. Violet tries to uphold her reputation as a solid caregiver and a stable adult and does not tell anybody about Jonah except Wendy, which isolates her. Similarly, Liza is labeled a responsible adult despite the fact that she self-destructs as she witnesses her partner Ryan’s experience with depression. Just like Violet, she believes she has to look like she has everything under control, and nobody knows how much she hurts because she hides it, unlike Wendy, who feels free to express her emotions fully.

Grace suffers because she is seen as the baby of the family. All three of her sisters act as a mother to her, and everyone dotes on her. However, nobody takes her seriously as an adult, which leaves her stunted. She hides from her family because she does not want them to see her failures and she remains almost in a cocoon in her home because of her lies. Once she is able to reveal her true situation to her family, she returns home and is able to heal in the ways that she needs to. All four of the Sorenson daughters suffer because their family fails to see them in their totality.

The Role of Parental Love in Family Dynamics

The central relationship in the Sorenson family is that between Marilyn and David, the matriarch and patriarch. They fall in love when they are young and quickly marry.

Marilyn and David’s relationship is known by everybody in their lives as being a very strong and loving one. However, this love is shown to be both a help and a hindrance to their daughters. It helps them in that they always feel secure in their family because they understand the bond that their parents have. This bond not only helps the girls as they grow up, but it also helps Jonah when he comes to live with them. Their bond creates a stable home, and Jonah thrives. Additionally, when Grace’s family learns that she is struggling, her parents bring her home so that she, too, can benefit from the stability of home.

However, their seemingly idyllic relationship is also seen as an impossible standard for their daughters to live up to. Liza in particular suffers from this standard, which causes her to feel inadequate and discouraged as both a partner and a mother. She feels guilty that her child will not grow up in a two-parent household like she did, and when she seeks reassurance from her mother, Marilyn is unable to provide it. The fact that Marilyn overlooks the true difficulties she had when her girls were younger and perpetuates the story of her fairy tale romance means that she cannot offer her daughters much support as they struggle in their own relationships. She reassures them that marital difficulties are normal, but she cannot tell them that she felt the same way. In addition, while the girls have the security of knowing their parents are stable, they experience some instability knowing that their parents will always put each other first. In some ways, this makes them feel like outsiders in their own family.

For Marilyn and David, their relationship is the most stabilizing influence in their lives. They struggle and fall into resentment at times, David even pursues a brief emotional affair, but they ultimately remain devoted to each other. As their children grow up and leave home, the two find solace in each other’s company. After David’s fall and heart attack, Marilyn cares for him in his difficult recovery. For Marilyn and David, their relationship is the main, and quite often the only, source of support they have through the trials of life.